About my Hamsa tattoo

I wanted a Hamsa of my own to have all the elements I had seen of others – spirals, circles, swirls and be unique to me, so I drew one out. Half thinking ‘this is crazy I probably won’t get this tattooed this week so this could be a giant waste of time’ the other half thinking ‘this is just incase, incase I find a tattooist I am prepared to get it done’.

I knew that nearby to my hairdressers was a tattoo place that possibly accepted walk ins or else I would book for another day. I walked around for a bit looking at my map app and at my surroundings and couldn’t find it. I took a new route home (I wasn’t even sure it was the right way home), I turned around to look back at the shops – and there it was.

I walked in and showed the cheerful tattooist my drawing, he made some alterations and a little while after it was all done!

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My original thoughts and feelings towards getting and having a Hamsa tattoo have altered a little overtime, or rather some things I still hold true and others I feel my attitude has changed for the better.

I was originally drawn to the Hamsa hand because it widely meant – peace, happiness, good fortune, protection from evil and the goodness of God. I think these are good reminders to living a happy true life.

I felt that just like my ‘alive’ tattoo they would hold a strong meaning to keep going to live my dreams and mark a new chapter of life. Also after reading Feel the fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers I wanted to mark the statement ‘I can handle it all’ on me, with a hand.

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All meanings – values to live by, a new chapter and handling everything in life are still present.

I think the biggest difference is that the novelty and magic has subsided for a more realistic point of view. Day to day, the greatest reminder comes through of my Hamsa is of faith of God/the Universe that everything is working out perfectly, the power and courage to be my true self and to hold inner peace and stillness in times of chaos.

I can glance at my arm and remember ‘choose love’, ‘everyone is different’, ‘nothing can bring you peace but yourself’.

I’m reading Conversations with God by Neal Donald Walsch in it he writes about life not being a series of ‘lessons’ (something I have always gone by) but of remembering. I think reading that, listening to talks by Abraham Hicks and meditating is allowing me to be who I am, appreciate life and God/the Universe.

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Artist date: Surprise stained glass window

The term ‘artist date’ is taken from Julia Cameron’s book The Artist Way. In short an artist date is a solo expedition to explore something that interests you, encourage you to fire up your imagination, to let go and play.

I set off on my journey yesterday with a fresh outlook on the test that was soon coming, I studied all morning and I finally felt pretty confident. I felt even better when I had crossed busy roads and found my destination with the help of google maps (both things I avoid) – this time I faced them.

I got to the reception of the test centre and was asked to get out my licence (this was my theory exam before my practical driving test) only to be told that I wasn’t on the list. BIG BREATH OUT ‘It’s not your fault’ I said forcing a smile, putting my licence away. I made a quick exit and started to well up, I rummaged about in my handbag and switched my regular glasses for my sunglasses and thought about it all.

First my mind raced with: I am crying in a public place. I’ve spent all morning learning about cars and roads, it feels like it was for nothing. I will be down as a no-show for my previous test date I thought I’d re-arranged. I’m going to have to pay for another test.

Next, I breathed more deeply and thought about all the good stuff I had learnt in videos lately.

Keep it moving. There is negative and positive. Breathe, when you breath deeply and slowly, your body will be calm and you can feel calmer.

Next I pulled out the things from this experience that were if at all positive:

I can use this time to study more, be more sure about it all and at least I know where the test centre is now.

I looked at my watch, I had one hour and a half before meeting my mum and a little money – I could take myself on a little artist date. So I did.

I took a walk back to the town centre, the Mr. called and looked up new test dates matched with my diary and re arranged everything with a confirmation email. That lifted a weight and I was ready to start my day again.

I first went to The Body Shop and picked myself up some coconut soap, people are raving about coconut products at the moment so I wanted to give something a try and make my shower time more enjoyable.

I made my way over to Holland and Barrett and bought a drink of 100% coconut water and banana chips (my favourite snack), I sat in the sun drinking my water and looked at a bookshop in front of me. The last time I had been there is was in peak time at Christmas and I could barely move. The layout of this shop is well set out, the balcony gives off an old book shop feel, so it is spacious and cosy at the same time.

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I went in, past travel and art to self development and spirituality as that’s what I felt drawn to. I picked up book after book till I felt happy with my pile. I sat at the chair and table, stretching out and looking around at the almost empty book store. Things were looking up, I felt better than before.

I picked up each book at random and read as little or as much as I felt I needed. I liked Healing Foods by Neal’s Yard, it had an encyclopaedia of fruits and vegetables along with their health benefits and suggested uses. At the back were recipe ideas, many pictures and manageable descriptions.

I read the first few pages of The power of NO, I liked how they listed our human rights with honest intriguing descriptions that make you re go over what you are free to do, but may have forgotten. I’m a little torn whether to buy this book but if your interested check out this review of the book.

Another book I felt really tuned into and I have yet to read anything by Dale Carnegie was How to stop worrying and start living. The title and the first few pages defiantly resonate with me, I am feeling myself worry less each day though I could do with some guidance. Sometimes the right book comes at the right time, perhaps that is now.

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While I was going through my books, I looked to my right at the wall next to the free table and chair I had chosen to go, I had sat beside a beautiful stained glass window. There stood a religious figure one arm held up in as if gesturing outwards, the other holding a brightly lit lantern.

Underneath were the words: I am the light of the world.

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